I am rooting for South Florida. I am rooting for Rutgers.

Easy, there, you gold 'n' blues. I know how easy it is to get under your skin, but this is not what you think.

I am rooting for the Bulls and Scarlet Knights to win six games. Exactly six games. No more, no less.

And it doesn't really matter which six, either. I'm going to assume Rutgers can polish off Howard and Texas Southern, and then it can win four others.

Similarly, I assume USF can muster the will to defeat Wofford and Charleston Southern. Win just four others, please.

So did you notice the same thing I did about those two teams? Yep, they both playing two members of the Football Cheesecake Subdivision. And so will Kansas State, Duke, North Carolina, North Carolina State and Mississippi.

(One figures that will not be prominently touted in their season-ticket brochures.)

I could try to root all seven teams on to a 6-6 season, but that would tax my increasingly finite focus. So I'll choose the Big East teams for my special devotion.

So why am I wanting these folks to go 6-6? Well, under the NCAA's definition of a "deserving winning team," (hey, it's in the Division I Manual, you can look 'er up) teams in the Football Bowl Subdivision (ugh) must win six games out of 12 to qualify for a bowl.

But you can only count one game against an FCS team. And if you're "stuck" with playing two FCS teams, it doesn't matter. You count only one.

Therefore, USF and Rutgers could very well go 6-6 and not qualify for, say, the PapaJohns.com Bowl in beautiful Birmingham. Worse, as far as the coaching staffs are concerned, the teams wouldn't get those precious extra practices.

Considering the scheduling tactics of both teams, I would laugh heartily for the next six months.

Once upon a time, in a newspaper far, far way, I used to advocate the banning of Rutgers from American television. Can't do that too much now, as the Scarlet Knights are respectable under Greg Schiano.

Maybe a little too respectable, as the Knights now think of themselves as an upper-crust school. After releasing its dreadfully bad schedule, Rutgers trotted out the sob story for its paying customers, as follows:

"We have worked diligently for months to complete our 2009 schedule with a Football Bowl Subdivision team," athletic director Tim Pernetti said. "We were unable to [persuade] any of the institutions with openings to come to Rutgers, including numerous BCS conference opponents.

"It is vital to our growth, development, and fan experience that we have seven home games in each season."

Umm ... I'm sorry. It is not conducive to any Division I school's growth, development and fan experience to schedule Texas Southern. Never, under any circumstances.

Houston shouldn't have done that in 2008, and the Cougars are four blocks away from TSU. I understand scheduling an FCS school to fill a home schedule, but you don't bring in Texas Southern, one of the consistently, incredibly decrepit programs in the lower division.

You're better off having an 11-game schedule than trying to perpetuate such a fraud on your fan base. Or maybe you should suck it up and schedule a sixth road game. Oh, the horrors!

I don't even want to hear USF's sob story. The Bulls' situation is simple - they are now refusing to play Central Florida, a natural rival 101 miles up Interstate 4. I guess USF is a Biiiiiiig East team, and it's too good to play a little ol' Conference USA school.

Oh, puh-leeze.

Just to remind the folks at USF, they are really fortunate. With a 12-year-old football program and even less basketball tradition, that school had exactly one credential to get into the Big East - a Florida address. Apparently, you need it for the rest of the league to recruit in the Sunshiney State.

I sort of understand that, but I don't understand USF's faux snobbiness. The Bulls play in an NFL stadium because they can (hopefully, not using or damaging the really cool pirate ship). They probably recruit on a smaller budget than that of Marshall, because ... they can.

Frankly, I hope the Bulls choke on that fluffy schedule and lose - but not too much. A 6-6 record is just fine, so they can watch other 6-6 teams play in bowl games.

From their couch, one hopes.

Reach Doug Smock at 304-348-5130 or dougsm...@wvgazette.com.